So... how do I regulate my nervous system?

A ton of people message me asking where to start with regulating their nervous system or somatic work. What even is somatics?? I was the same way. I understood that it helped people recover, but how?

With nervous system regulation, first, you have to understand why this work is so important. Understanding it on a biological level is when it really started clicking for me. Right now, you have dysregulation of the autonomic nervous system. In simpler terms: the body’s “threat and energy management system” got stuck in the wrong mode/in a chronic loop. Below is a clear breakdown of what that means biologically. Your nervous system controls energy allocation.

The Autonomic Nervous System automatically controls functions like:

• heart rate

• blood pressure

• digestion

• immune activity

• energy production

  
  

It has two main branches:

• Sympathetic Nervous System – “fight or flight”

• Parasympathetic Nervous System – “rest, repair, and recovery”

  
  

In people with ME/CFS or anyone with chronic neuroplastic symptoms, research shows the system is in chronic sympathetic activation (threat/fight or flight mode). This affects how the body distributes energy, pain and much more.

What that does:

• Blood flow gets prioritized to survival systems, not repair

• Digestion and mitochondrial function slow down

• The immune system becomes dysregulated

• The brain perceives activity as a bigger stressor than it should

  
  

A key brain region involved is the amygdala, which detects danger and activates stress responses. It becomes hypersensitive so the brain is essentially misinterpreting signals from the body as danger. This affects communication between the brain and body through the vagus nerve, a major pathway regulating inflammation, heart rate, and recovery.

What can trigger the amygdala to become hypersentive? What keeps your brain in fight or flight. Some examples are:

• Unprocessed or suppressed grief, shame, rage etc.

• Childhood trauma that lasted years

• Chronic stress in relationships/family

• Growing up or currently living in an inconsistent/emotionally unsafe environment

• Chronic misalignment in life (jobs, where you live, relationships, what you do with your time vs. what you would rather be doing)

• Chronic self-abandonment or criticism, limiting beliefs about yourself your entire life

• Getting sick often, viruses, wear and tear on your immune system

• LOADS more

  
  

Nervous system regulation over time shifts the body out of fight or flight and into parasympathetic (a felt sense of safety). Practices that regulate the nervous system aim to cultivate safety into the brain and body, which retrains the brain and autonomic system to feel safe again.

When all of that that happens, the body can allocate more resources toward healing and energy production and over time feel safe enough to slowly turn off that threat response.

Now that it’s clear that how and why nervous system regulation is essential, let’s talk about the right ways to regulate. It seems so simple, but each thing I list holds so much meaning to the body on a biological level. Don't underestimate the power of each small thing.

These are the simple practices that helped me most. Before getting into the emotional release side of somatics, I recommend regulating your nervous system in other ways for a while first, to create a good baseline and help your capacity grow. Your body is so sensitive early on in healing that the emotional stuff may just be a little too much to dive into first thing.

1. Patience. I'm not just saying to have patience with this process, because yes, it takes months of regulating to see changes in symptoms. But we aren't monitoring symptoms, we are monitoring how well we are responding to them with compassion and neutrality, WHILE incorporating nervous system work. Patience also straight up regulates you. Releasing the feeling of urgency and feeling like there is something to fix, sends signals to the brain that there is nothing wrong anyways and that you're safe just... existing. Going into nervous system work, remember radical acceptance, trusting your body and patience.

2. Guided meditations. You can find a ton on YouTube before bed and during the day. This includes yoga nidra or any meditation that involves visualization, cultivating safety, sleep talk down, etc. It’s a very safe way to down regulate, get out of your head and into your body. It naturally puts you into a rest and digest state. When I started with this work, I found this was the most noticeable way to feel the shift in my body. If you ever have the urge to cry during a meditation, even if it's for what seems like no reason, don't hold back, this in it self is regulating and a great sign that your body is beginning to feel safe. Do it every single day!

   
   

   Sometimes there’s not really much indication that the body is down regulating, but the most noticeable shift will be a yawn, a large sigh, maybe the urge to cry, movement or change of symptoms (not always less symptoms, just them shifting around the body.)

3. Nutrition and Protein. What you eat and drink profoundly affects your gut, which is directly connected to your nervous system. Aim for a diet rich in protien, whole foods, with plenty of vegetables and fruits. Avoid processed sugar and foods, and alcohol. Obviously avoid caffine completely. I also recommend herbal teas in the morning and and evening. Or just hot water with lemon if you don't have tea. OR bone broth in the morning first thing on an empty stomach. Warm drinks can be very soothing to the gut and the nervous system.

   
   

   When I started beginning my day with protien, I started seeing a shift in my energy. I eat 3 hard boiled eggs and a patty of organic grass fed beef every single morning. Eat protein rich foods that stabilize your blood sugar levels. I started adding kiwi as well after learning that it has of ton probiotics and digestive enzymes that help with gut microbiome diversity and breakdown of protein.

   
   

4. SOMATICS!

Orienting

One of the fastest ways to calm the nervous system is to remind it that you are safe right now. Slowly look around your space. Let your eyes land on objects, colors, or light. Notice where you are without rushing. Do it for a few minutes. Be bored. Be in the now.

Why it works: This signals to your brain that there’s no immediate threat.

Physiological Sigh

Take a deep inhale through your nose, then take a second short inhale before slowly exhaling through your mouth making a moaning sound. Repeat 2–5 times.

Why it works: This pattern naturally reduces stress and helps reset your breathing rhythm.

Humming or Vagal Toning

Hum softly, chant, or even lightly sing.

Let the vibration resonate in your chest and throat.

Why it works: Stimulates the vagus nerve, which plays a key role in relaxation.

Self-Holding (Butterfly Hug)

Cross your arms over your chest and gently tap or hold your shoulders. Alternate tapping slowly from side to side. I also like to hold onto my upper arms and massage them. Self message signals safety. Hold yourself like you are someone you love (because you are!).

Why it works: Provides a sense of containment and safety, especially during crying, anxiety or emotional overwhelm.

Slow, Intentional Movement

Move your body slowly—roll your shoulders, stretch your arms, or gently sway.

The key is to move at about 50% of your normal speed. Nice and slow.

Why it works: Slowness communicates safety to your nervous system.

Grounding Through the Feet

Press your feet firmly into the ground. Notice the support beneath you.

You can even push gently down and release, like you’re testing the ground. (Double points if you do this outside in the grass, good negative ions for the body!)

Why it works: Helps bring awareness out of thoughts and back into the body.

Humming or Vagal Toning

Hum softly, chant, or even sing.

Let the vibration resonate in your chest and throat.

Why it works: Stimulates the vagus nerve, which plays a key role in relaxation.

Eye Movement Reset

Keep your head still and slowly move your eyes side to side.

Take your time and breathe naturally.

Why it works: Helps process stress and can reduce feelings of being “stuck.”

Extended Inhale/Exhale Breathing

Inhale as slow as you can through the nose, fill up the belly first, then the chest. Exhale as slow as possible through the mouth. Like you have an invisible piece of paper in front of your nose/mouth you don't want to move. Let your exhale naturally be a little longer than the inhale.

Why it works: Longer exhales activate the body’s calming response.

Touch

Place a hand on your heart, your belly, or your face. You can place your fingers on your face and slowly slide from your forehead to your chin. Apply gentle pressure and take a few deeper breaths. You can also glide your fingers up and down your arms.

Why it works: Touch can be deeply regulating and reassuring.

Somatic Experiencing

This includes dropping into your body and validating everything your body feels. Emotionally and physically. Working with a coach or someone who can guide you early on until you get the hang of it was very helpful for me. There are also somatic experiencing videos on youtube that I did before I started working with a somatic coach. For example - let's say you have chronic leg pain. Get in a relaxed comfortable position and feel your body exisiting. Just be in your body for a moment. Then focus on the leg pain. Sit with it. Validate it. Tell it that you hear it's call for attention. And just be with it. If random emotions come up, good. Validate those too, let yourself feel the pain, the hurt, whatever comes up. Then let it pass.

Since we're on the topic of somatics, I want to share with a quick personal story about a trauma-informed somatic session with my somatic therapist early last year. She asked me what was bothering me the most that day and I said my heavy fatigue (per usual). So she had me sit with myself, observe it, not judge it and not be frustrated by it, as it was just a message. I closed my eyes and she guided me through my emotions around the fatigue. Where in my body I felt it, where in my head, if it had an age or a time period in my life that was seeking attention or expression. Somehow, things from my past started to pop up, and I became overwhelmed with emotion. I found myself crying from emotions I completely forgot I needed to feel years ago, that I couldn't fully understand or process at that time and probably ended up suppressing. She told me I was safe to express it however I wanted. And I actually did safe. So I just cried. Without sharing too much detail, we allowed my inner child to feel seen, validated and safe, during a time in my past where I didn't. We reassured myself that the trauma of that past experience was over and done. I had immediate relief of my fatigue that day. And that blew my mind. That was it. I was convinced. Somatics were going to change the game for my healing. And they did.

Allowing the body to be seen. Allowing the emotions to be FELT in their entirety without judgement. That is something that regulates your nervous system. Because it makes us feel SAFE to FEEL.

If emotions come up during somatic experiencing or any somatic exercise, that's a good thing. That means your body feels safe to release. It's very important to allow yourself to release without judgement. Tell yourself that it is safe to feel whatever you need, anger, rage, sadness, shame, grief. It's all safe to come up.

Keep at this! Learn how to regulate, and you're already half way to recovered!! Just keep going, don't give up after you these things for 3 days and feel no difference. Also if you're looking for a somatic/recovery coach, I'm your girl. If you have any questions, please send me a DM or an email!

Sending love.

Your friend,

Zoey <3